This morning the alarm went off at five am, just like it does every school morning. Truth be told, I am not terribly fond of the alarm clock on any given morning but today it seemed to beep more shrilly, more loudly and more annoyingly than any previous day. I trudged to the kids rooms and awoke them one by one. On any given school day, it takes a few minutes of prodding and cajoling to get them moving but today it took longer and they griped louder and I was proddy-er (yes that is a word....it's my blog and I say so ;)
We made it downstairs and the light was more blaring causing the daily Jamie melt down to be more melting downy-er (again a word....see previous caveat) and the daily Benny meltdown triggered by the daily Jamie meltdown was WAY Benny-er. Sam was slower, breakfast was wronger, Alex was more purposely annoying-er (Alex is my stir the pot kid), Paul was Aspie-er. It was a very "er" kind of day.
Everyday, I try to look at my life through the lens of humor. Everyday, I try to choose laughing instead of crying. Everyday, I purpose to not let my families circumstances or disabilities define my attitude. But today was just such an "er" day. Today, the two months from hell collided with my "er" day and I was in a proper snit. I dropped Paul off at school, went home and I had myself a proper pity party, complete with party hats and streamers. It really is a shame that only the cats were here to witness it! Those fifteen minutes were the stuff legends are made of. Then I had to give myself a time out. "Self" said I "get it together. This is not the way we behave." "But I'm sick of everything being a fight. The past two months have been terrible!! I've had this bad thing happen and this annoying thing happen and this frustrating thing happen AND this completely ridiculously blown out of proportion thing happen (bad things expunged from the record to save you from reading all my whining;) and to top it all off I have had a very bad day!! (insert foot stomp here)" I replied. (Yes, I had a two part conversation with myself. Don't worry the funny farm is on my speed dial. A friend and I have decided to coordinate our breakdowns. This way we can share a room;) "That's it! You are in time out. Have a cup of coffee, eat some breakfast, take a hot shower and watch an episode of I Love Lucy. Take a minute, get your attitude in line and your sense of humor back!" I snapped at myself.
So that is just what I did. I spent an hour getting myself together, putting my big girl panties back on and choosing to change my attitude. Afterwards, I looked back at my morning and the truth is, this morning was exactly like every school morning here in Skiffland. It turns out the only real "er" in my morning was that I was attitudey-er.
Since taking a few minutes to reset my attitude and my sense of humor, my day has gone fine. I just needed to refocus on what is important and take the "er" out of my day. I hope things are well for you my friends. As always lots of love-Kristine