I awoke instantly the shriek of the benny bird still reverberating around the room. I covered my head with my pillow, willing myself to grab a few more precious moments of sleep. The pillow could not drown the shrill call of the benny bird any more than a sandcastle can hold back the tide. I quietly placed my feet on the floor one at a time hoping against hope the shrill shrieking would end and I could get back into bed no one being the wiser that I had awaken from my slumber. Alas it was not to be. The shrill shrieks increased in volume and pitch. The benny bird is quite rare in our kingdom. In fact there is only one documented in all of Skiffdom. It is known to be playful and inquisitive and will pleasantly chatter all day. However when it feels threatened or unhappy its pleasant chatter becomes shrieks and cries so shrill they have on occasion shattered glass. If I was to quiet the benny bird and restore peace to the kingdom I would need all my wits about me. With this in mind I immediately went to The Spring of Oster. It’s magical, hot black water is known to bring alertness to the mind and give energy to the body.
I climbed the Stairs of Prayer. Beyond the stairs lies the Land of Chaos. A wise traveler will slowly climb the stairs, praying fervently on each step. One never knows what will await them in the Land of Chaos so it is a good idea to prepare ones soul ahead of time. Today there was no time to take the stairs at a reverent pace. Instead I whispered a quick prayer for guidance as I bounded heedlessly into battle. To my surprise all was quiet and calm in Chaos. A great shudder of apprehension ran down my spine. If the benny bird was not in Chaos that left only one unthinkable option, a possibility so horrible, so terrifying, I had to stop briefly to gain my courage. He had to be trapped in the darklands known only as The Bedroom of the Beasts. Very few who have ventured in have ever come back out. I have heard horrifying tales of great mountains named Lego and Laundry. Every step on Mt Lego is said to be torturous, bringing the bravest warrior to their knees in agonizing pain. Mt Laundry is known for its stench. It is said that one cannot stand on its peak without succumbing to the toxic fumes. I tentatively step through the gate. I see the tiger twins; they lay in wait high in the bunk tree. The benny bird is circling the lower branches squawking possessively about something. I cannot make sense of what the benny bird is squawking. Once he reaches a certain decibel the only thing the human ear can perceive is pain. I try to talk him down slowly. As the decibel decreases I begin to understand the problem. It seems one of the tiger twins, the ferocious Alex, has dared to disagree with the benny birds claim of superiority. The more passive of the twins, Jamie the Just, decreed that a show of strength would determine the winner. I arrive just in time to stop the carnage. Now that I have seen first-hand the terrors in the Bedroom of the Beast I declare a new holiday. A holiday that will from now and forever more be known as “The Day of Renewal”. This celebration will be honored weekly by destroying Mt Laundry and bringing the pieces to the Pool of Tide. Each piece will be placed in the pool and washed. Mt Lego must be ritualistically dismantled. Its pieces are to be placed in the Chest of Rubbermaid. And all the land will rejoice and be merry as they smell the wonderful lemony scent of their Pledge. And the sun shone brightly upon all Skiffdom and they lived happily ever after.
This has been a lyrical interpretation of my morning on Tuesday. After I restored peace to the house the whole morning came back to me in fairytale form so I figured I’d share it here. I hope you enjoyed my “fictionalized” day.- Kristine